Sunday, May 15, 2005

A List of Villains, in Order of How Much Tail They Get.

1. Kang
2. Batroc the Leaper
3. The Leader (trust me)
4. The Mandarin
5. Kraven the Hunter
6. Loki
7. Doctor Doom (contrary to popular belief, Doom's armor allows for quick release of his slightly-below-average, uncircumcised Latverian schvanson)
8. Mysterio
9. Maximus the Mad
10. Arcade

A Footnote:

Some villains have been discounted due to impotence: Magneto, The Red Skull, and The Vulture II. (Surprisingly, Vulture I is quite virile.)

7 Love Letters:

Anonymous Rob said...

How would your Vandal Savage or Ra's al Ghul measure up against these inspiring examples of super-villainous casanovary?

Just wondered...

4:49 AM

Blogger alex said...

Good Question!

Maybe a blog entry for a later date...

7:02 AM

Blogger Woody! said...

There is no way that Batroc gets more tail than half those guys on that list. I bet Hypno Huslter has better luck with the ladies that that frenchie.

2:22 PM

Blogger Joe Rice said...

I bet Batroc has lower standards, though. Kang will go throughout time to find the hottest men and women for sexmaking. Batroc will take the fattie at the bar.

4:03 PM

Blogger alex said...

Trust me, guys.

Batroc gets more tail than a toilet seat.

No one can explain it. It just happens.

8:34 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Batroc Ze Leaper? Wake up, you clowns, if you copied Batroc's shit in real life you'd be swimming in it. SWIMMING. IN. IT.

Mysterio, though?

10:05 PM

Blogger Brad Curran said...

"The Vulture II. (Surprisingly, Vulture I is quite virile.)"

This is an often overlooked facet of the original Vulture's character. Thank you for giving him some due, finally.

10:04 PM


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